As a counselor, I deal with a wide range of issues including work, love, money, and child-rearing.
Among these, the most common issues are related to close personal relationships such as those with family, bosses, and subordinates.
Those with knowledge of psychology and counseling are well aware that many of these issues trace back to the relationship with one’s parents.
Children grow and develop by mimicking their parents’ worldview, way of thinking, and even how they handle emotions.
The relationships during adolescence are also significant.
Adolescence is a time when awareness starts to shift from the family (home) to society. During this period, individuals learn how to interact with others primarily in school.
Friendships formed during this time have a substantial impact on relationships later in life.
In my counseling practice, I first focus on the relationship with one’s parents and then on relationships during adolescence. However, occasionally, issues arise that cannot be fully explained by these two factors alone.
One such issue is the relationship between siblings.
The sibling relationship is more complex than the parent-child relationship.
Factors such as birth order, gender combinations, age differences, and individual personalities, intelligence, physical abilities, and relationship with parents all intertwine.
If the parent-child relationship forms the basis of hierarchical relationships, then sibling relationships form the basis of horizontal connections.
Think back to your time in school.
The dependable classmates who served as class representatives, took on leadership roles in school events, or were captains in clubs were often the first-born children.
Similarly, popular classmates who were mood makers and brought smiles to everyone were often the youngest.
As you follow their lives, you will often find that the first-borns who took on leadership roles in school continue to take on leadership roles in their families and careers.
On the other hand, the youngest, who were cherished and affectionate, often continue to play the role of the “adorable one” in their workplaces.
Of course, this does not apply to every case.
However, it is not uncommon for first-borns to become responsible leaders and youngest children to become affectionate and charming individuals.
It seems as though the roles they played in their families during childhood are seamlessly carried over into their lives at school and in society.